The Thing About Resolutions...

It's 2014! Happy New Year, readers!

Resolutions? Well I have a few, but the thing about resolutions is after the first quarter it disappears! So why do we make them?

The idea of a resolution is to change our habits, to grow, better, and to make this positive change a habit and integrate it into our being. The thing is if we don't see it as a part of us from the beginning, it's never going to work. One has to be mindful, and conscious of this new aspect throughout the year, until it's an old aspect. Right?

Let's take for example losing weight. People work out for the first 3 months, until they lose 10 lbs! They are like Yay! The thing is then they leave it. The thing about weight loss is continuing with an active lifestyle. Plus eating healthy, etc., as I have mentioned in my other blogs. Kind of like weight loss, lets look at giving up a certain behavior pattern, for something better, ie. being more positive, quitting alcohol. These are tough changes, and more psychological than what a "resolution" represents these days. Instead of trying to become more positive, start by saying I am positive person, and follow through with a positive action. While breaking a bad habit, such as quitting drinking, or coffee, is weaning yourself off it, substituting, and disassociating with that thing (in this case alcohol).

So a resolution is in fact a lifestyle change often, right? Unless it's something like, this year I will connect with my high-school friends, or will go on a vacation this year. Sometimes those too include lifestyle changes, making time for new people in your life, or saving up for that vacation.

Here I am able to finally explain my resolutions:
1) to be more present, especially in the presence of loved ones. This means being more conscious of my actions and behavior over all. I do feel meditation can help me. Staying true to myself too.
2) I will, try to be less attached to my cell phone this year. I will try to curb my Nomophobia.
3) Follow through with my book plans, which means less TV, and less Xbox, more focusing on projects.
4) Lose weight. Going to the gym everyday to get either 15-20 minute work out in, or for a whopping two hours. Whatever the duration of the work out, goal is at least 10-14 miles a week.
5) Eating healthy, it starts at home! I'm going to learn to be happy and satisfied, binge-ing on carrots... actually as my personal trainer says, if you want some cake, have it, 1 small piece, just remember to do the work for it.
6) Save more money, spend less!

Those are my small - big goals! What are your "resolutions"?


Breathe!

The Wall - Jon's Lament

"You know nothing, Jon Snow." Yigrette
She would tell me many a time,
Then she betrayed me like I would never forget,
She did what she knew, I forgive her of her crime.

The wall it stands there,
Looming,
Just thick ice reflecting the sun's glare,
Throughout the North, where it is forever gloaming.

Shall we place the wall between us?
With you on the cold side
Me on the South side
It freezes our love and trust.

I was always true,
To my black brothers and to you.
Then there was that moment,
When I had to choose, and it was sealed in cmement.

I chose to forgive,
I chose mercy and honor,
For the old man to live,
We had him in a corner...

You killed the old man,
For what? He begged for mercy.
Then you shot me in the leg, woman!
I know all women are crazy...

You know nothing Jon Snow!
That's all you said,
South of the wall I knew all there is to know,
I loved you for more than just to take you to bed.

I knew we could have had a different life,
We could have started afresh,
Without sticking the man with the knife,
You went ahead and created a mess.

I know you would blame me,
Saying "you know nothing, Jon Snow",
I am not as naive as I seem to be,
You just didn't see the entirety of the show.

Now you are gone,
I shall miss you,
Remembering always all that was done,
However, everyday is begins anew.



For Jon Snow, of the Night's Watch, on the Wall...

The Game of...

Everyone plays a game;

There is the game of love,
Until you become jaded and frayed.
Some play silly games, innocent as a dove,
Until your heart is broken from all the games played.

Men play the game of thrones
Across cities, countries and continents,
How the people weep,
When the Rich play their games.

There is The Game,
That no one can never be win,
No throne to claim,
No prize at the end. Just naught. Fin.

Valar Morghulis.

The game of life,
Some are aware of it, Some call it strife,
Some are caught up in the petty,
To worried about wealth, or looking pretty.

The game of life,
We all seem to play,
Some play it with ethics and morals,

Some with another man's wife.


The game of life,
A tricky one it is, some play it with a knife,
Some play it well, some play you for a fool,
Some are conniving, while others... pure evil.

Some play bravely, others are loyal and true...
Which one are you?
What game do you play?
Oh hark, you will pay you toll at the end of the day.

Valar Morghulis.

Will the Real Guru Ji Please Stand Up

"What's the best kind of Yoga to learn?"
"Which Yoga studio/ashram/guru/type of yoga is the best?"
"Do you have to be a Hindu to do Yoga?"
"I am not flexible, how can I do yoga?"
"What is real yoga?"

These are questions people ask me a lot as an Indian and as a Yogi. Often times I am not equipped to answer them.

I just watched Kumare, and I totally felt Vikram Gandhi's strife - growing up in the USA, with Indian values. Wanting to break free from these ancient seemingly nonsensical stuff yet people of this western world- America- are moving towards it. The absurdity! So seriously I was enthralled by Buffy, Friends, and X-Files. I really wanted to be an FBI agent. And here there are people dreaming of becoming a Yogi, of enlightenment, happiness, peace and calmness.

As an Indian I was taught to value education, education, achievement, career, achievement, normalcy, and success. What does that mean? Well it means - get super educated, get a career that you can make the big bucks from, settle down, make a family, and then live in the luxury that pre-independence Indians could not dream of. This didn't make sense to me, because I wanted more than just that flow. I like a different sun salutation everyday. Why should I do the same one, when my body tells me to stretch this way! I became a rebel, death metal, the goth culture, etc. so alluring, especially cause it freaked "normal" people out. I matured and looked deeper, and like Vikram I studied religion, as well as psychology, cultural geography etc.

I began listening to the guru inside me, because I never could connect with an external guru, I did have people I connected with, empathized with, and listened to their advice or their words of wisdom. Worship never sat well with me. I think of all things I believe in the Universe, nature, and the powerful energy that runs through us all the most. Call it God? Ok! I don't have a name for it, and it has no rules for me, except I must be a good person, cause hurting others just don't feel good.

Yoga has always been a part of my life, cause 1- I'm Indian, and my mom's grandad taught her, and its a cultural thing for most of us. 2- My mom was really into it all her life 3- My mom made my sis and I go to the Sivananda Yoga Ashram in Chennai back when we were itty bitty, against our will may I add... we had no idea what this "Yoga" was going to be. We liked it. We liked yoga cause we could become animals and hop around - a crow, a dog, a cat, a cow, a lion, a tree, a upside down person, a peacock... and then we made up our own animals.

Fast forward 23 years, I am finally working on my Yoga teacher certification, which I should have gotten years ago from the center, but as mentioned before, I wanted to be Buffy and not Yogi! I get to USA and everyone is Yogi, and I am Buffy! Ha! My journey through life, its pains, joys, taught me much, and the time was ready for this deeper learning of Yoga. It was still the ability to turn into other animals, however NOW it was something much deeper.

Through this learning of Yoga, I connect better with people, better myself and skills (slowly but surely, such a tough process and I often stumble), and understand the world, universe and life with a clarity previously unfound. Then again my boyfriend Ryan, is a Kumare, traveling his on path. It's amazing how people understand the same deep truth which is right in front of us through different journeys. Some of us need a mirror, some of search in other cultures, religions, practices, traveling, and others just see it as it is.

It's not about education, accomplishment or achievement... it's about putting all that aside and seeing the truth. It's harder to do than it seems to be. Something so simple yet so difficult for so many to achieve? It' kind of like Einstein's works, it makes so much sense, and so simple yet he put it all together.
Definitely watch Kumare if you haven't. It's on Netflix. Stop searching externally, and seek within... (he's not saying worship yourself and inflate your ego). Yoga helps introspect, as well as so many other benefits. Find your own path, read, definitely study the old Hindu scriptures, there is much wisdom and truth there.

Guru's are great for being guided, growing and taught, which not able to understand a process. Gurus are not made through certifications, PhDs etc. although some people think they are...  but anyway are / should be spiritual friends who help you wake up. We must share our paths to grow. I am so lucky to have an amazing set of gurujis!

I'm not great guru... I'm just me, Pree. I might not be right but these are things which I have learned and know. So here are my answers to the questions asked

What Yoga school is good/ real/ correct? It depends on what you are looking for! Google is a great tool to research yoga. However in the end Yoga is Yoga is Yoga. Just like which Christianity is the right/true/real Christianity?  Baptists? Protestants? Catholics? Lutherans? It just depends on if you want an asana focused practice, chanting focused practice, or service focused practice. Within the Asana focused practice there is so many different types of practice concerning asana... etc.


There are many awesome Yoga studios in Ohio! Go to different classes at different places and find out which yoga class suits you! I like slow restorative yoga to a good vinyasa flow.

One does not need to be flexible to do yoga. Everyone can do yoga. Only lazy people can not do yoga. You also don't have to be Hindu to do yoga. Also being Hindu doesn't mean worshiping multiple Gods... those who think so are dhakkans. Read!

What is yoga... real yoga? Well you have to learn to find out!




Breathe


and

Live.

An article about chanting in sanskrit

Can You Take Criticism? Learn How to Handle it Gracefully...

This blog is a repost of an article I read and fell in love with. I just had to share it with my readers!

25 Reasons to Embrace Criticism

--by Lori Deschene


“Criticism is something you can easily avoid by saying nothing, doing nothing, and being nothing.” ~Aristotle

At the end of the day, when I feel completely exhausted, oftentimes it has nothing to do with all the things I’ve done.

It’s not a consequence of juggling multiple responsibilities and projects. It’s not my body’s way of punishing me for becoming a late-life jogger after a period of cardiovascular laziness. It’s not even about getting too little sleep.

When I’m exhausted, you can be sure I’ve bent over backwards trying to win everyone’s approval. I’ve obsessed over what people think of me, I’ve assigned speculative and usually inaccurate meanings to feedback I’ve received, and I’ve lost myself in negative thoughts about criticism and its merit.

I work at minimizing this type of behavior—and I’ve had success for the most part—but admittedly it’s not easy.

I remember back in college, taking a summer acting class, when I actually made the people around me uncomfortable with my defensiveness. This one time, the teacher was giving me feedback after a scene in front of the whole class. She couldn’t get through a single sentence without me offering some type of argument.

After a couple minutes of verbal sparring, one of my peers actually said, “Stop talking. You’re embarrassing yourself.”

Looking back, I cut myself a little slack. You’re vulnerable in the spotlight and the student’s reaction was kind of harsh. But I know I needed to hear it. Because I was desperately afraid of being judged, I took everything, from everyone as condemnation.

I realize criticism doesn’t always come gently from someone legitimately trying to help. A lot of the feedback we receive is unsolicited and doesn’t come from teachers—or maybe all of it does.

We can’t control what other people will say to us, whether they’ll approve or form opinions and share them. But we can control how we internalize it, respond to it, and learn from it, and when we release it and move on.

If you’ve been having a hard time dealing with criticism lately, it may help to remember the following:

The Benefits of Criticism:

Personal Growth

1. Looking for seeds of truth in criticism encourages humility. It’s not easy to take an honest look at yourself and your weaknesses, but you can only grow if you’re willing to try.

2. Learning from criticism allows you to improve. Almost every critique gives you a tool to more effectively create the tomorrow you visualize.

3. Criticism opens you up to new perspectives and new ideas you may not have considered. Whenever someone challenges you, they help expand your thinking.

4. Your critics give you an opportunity to practice active listening. This means you resist the urge to analyze in your head, planning your rebuttal, and simply consider what the other person is saying.

5. You have the chance to practice forgiveness when you come up against harsh critics. Most of us carry around stress and frustration that we unintentionally misdirect from time to time.

Emotional Benefits

6. It’s helpful to learn how to sit with the discomfort of an initial emotional reaction instead of immediately acting or retaliating. All too often we want to do something with our feelings—generally not a great idea!

7. Criticism gives you the chance to foster problem solving skills, which isn’t always easy when you’re feeling sensitive, self-critical, or annoyed with your critic.

8. Receiving criticism that hits a sensitive spot helps you explore unresolved issues.Maybe you’re sensitive about your intelligence because you’re holding onto something someone said to you years ago—something you need to release.

9. Interpreting someone else’s feedback is an opportunity for rational thinking—sometimes, despite a negative tone, criticism is incredibly useful.

10. Criticism encourages you to question your instinctive associations and feelings; praise is good, criticism is bad. If we recondition ourselves to see things in less black and white terms, there’s no stop to how far we can go!

Improved Relationships

11. Criticism presents an opportunity to choose peace over conflict. Oftentimes, when criticized our instinct is to fight, creating unnecessary drama. The people around us generally want to help us, not judge us.

12. Fielding criticism well helps you mitigate the need to be right. Nothing closes an open mind like ego—bad for your personal growth, and damaging for relationships.

13. Your critics give you an opportunity to challenge any people-pleasing tendencies.Relationships based on a constant need for approval can be draining for everyone involved. It’s liberating to let people think whatever they want—they’re going to do it anyway.

14. Criticism gives you the chance to teach people how to treat you. If someone delivers it poorly, you can take this opportunity to tell them, “I think you make some valid points, but I would receive them better if you didn’t raise your voice.”

15. Certain pieces of criticism teach you not to sweat the small stuff. In the grand scheme of things, it doesn’t matter that your boyfriend thinks you load the dishwasher “wrong.”

Time Efficiency

16. The more time you spend dwelling about what someone said, the less time you have to do something with it.

17. If you improve how you operate after receiving criticism, this will save time and energy in the future. When you think about from that perspective—criticism as a time saver—it’s hard not to appreciate it!

18. Fostering the ability to let go of your feelings and thoughts about being critiqued can help you let go in other areas of your life. Letting go of worries, regrets, stresses, fears, and even positive feelings helps you root yourself in the present moment. Mindfulness is always the most efficient use of time.

19. Criticism reinforces the power of personal space. Taking 10 minutes to process your emotions, perhaps by writing in a journal, will ensure you respond well. And responding the well the first time prevents one critical comment from dominating your day.

20. In some cases, criticism teaches you how to interact with a person, if they’re negative or hostile, for example. Knowing this can save you a lot of time and stress in the future.

Self Confidence

21. Learning to receive false criticism—feedback that has no constructive value—without losing your confidence is a must if you want to do big things in life. The more attention your work receives, the more criticism you’ll have to field.

22. When someone criticizes you, it shines a light on your own insecurities. If you secretly agree that you’re lazy, you should get to the root of that. Why do you believe that—and what can you do about it?

23. Learning to move forward after criticism, even if you don’t feel incredibly confident, ensures no isolated comment prevents you from seizing your dreams.Think of it as separating the wheat from the chaff; takes what’s useful, leave the rest, and keep going!

24. When someone else appraises your harshly, you have an opportunity to monitor your internal self-talk. Research indicates up to 80% of our thoughts are negative. Take this opportunity to monitor and change your thought processes so you don’t drain and sabotage yourself!

25. Receiving feedback well reminds you it’s OK to have flaws—imperfection is part of being human. If you can admit weakness and work on them without getting down on yourself, you’ll experience far more happiness, peace, enjoyment, and success.

We are all perfectly imperfect, and other people may notice that from time to time. We may even notice in it each other.

Somehow accepting that is a huge weight off my mind.

Breathe!

and 

Live!

Bicycles, Accidents, and Meditation

IIt has been over three years since my bicycling accident in 2009 (read about it here), and I had no idea how much it still affected me.
I took up riding again, well even looking at my bicycle a little less than a year, after it happened. It took a lot of courage to start riding again by pedaling down the drive way. Since then I had biked only on the sidewalk or the Towpath trail, and most of it was flat or very gently sloping... never any paved area like those hills.

This past weekend, Ryan and I decided to explore the All Purpose Trail, that runs through, connecting all the Cleveland Metroparks. This is the "Emerald Necklace" of Cleveland; we were at the Redford Reservation of the Necklace. We had never biked here before, the only one we have biked is Hinckley, and the Towpath part of Brecksville. Both are very mild when it comes to hills. We began at Hawthorne Parkway and Richmond Road, and biked West towards the main reservation.

We biked the eastern portion of the Bedford Reservation, which was mostly flat, and ever so slightly sloped, enough to get that little uphill workout; entering the main reservation with a sharp turn to the right, and the trail here is all shady! The trail here was a bit more hilly. With wide curves that hugged the road.

When we finally neared the "Bridal Veil Falls" parking lot, I had a panic attack going down the hill. The hill here is steeper than the previous ones with a sharp curve almost. The trail touches the road here. Ofcourse the hill is steep here, this is where the river cut through the land. I didn't peddle, and the bike sped up, building up momentum. I checked my speedometer, it read 23 mph, the trail and the road were one at this area, and the cars were flying past. The situation made me recall that day, the feelings right before the crash, I stopped midway up the second hill, and began dry heaving as nausea and something ugly tied my stomach up in knots. I kind of froze, and could not stop tears from running down my face. I walked the rest of the way up, as Ryan had already reached the top of the hill, using the momentum from the ride down to get easily up the other side.

I couldn't ride anymore. I was having a hard time breathing, like asthma but something else was crushing my chest. I don't want to remember that moment, cause it was like utter fear had clutched me... and it was JUST A HILL. The accident back then in 2009 was funny now, so WHY was I so afraid?

Ryan talked me back on my bike, and helped me calm down. We decided to turn around, for we had 5 or 6 miles back to the car. So I took the ride down the hill slow, and by the time I was half way up the crest of the next hill I threw up. Ryan says it was like out of a movie... I threw up as I halted. I can see it being funny, but my lungs, my muscles and my mind were still writhing in fear. I felt sick. Ryan made me drink some water. He talked me somehow on to my bike again - reasoning, logic, calming me, going over a strategy to get over and around the fear. Whatever he said helped, and we biked a few hills, and went down a few, until we came to a place where there were monkey bars. I love monkey bars, so we did a few rounds of them.

While swinging, and moving across the monkey bars using only my arms, I remembered why I loved to climb. I also realized what I needed to do to get over this residual stress caused by the traumatic accident (also known as PTSD- Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome): Meditate on it. I got over my fear of heights by climbing, meditating on it and taking it slow. However biking, can't really take it slow, so I have to meditate on speed and control.

Ever since the accident I've been less sure on my bike, more shaky and full of self doubt. I was much better before, and I am getting better. Practice, meditation, and whatever other therapy it takes others to over come it, how can I forget, a little help from Ryan! This is something I must work on if my far fetched dreams are ever to be achieved. Which got me thinking is there any therapy for recovering bikers? There has to be since biking as an activity has increased over the last 10 years.

I've loved biking since childhood, it was always an integral part our daily activities for my sister and I. I was not and am not willing to give it up on account of an accident. Although before I was less inclined to wear helmet, and other protection, now I realize how a camelbak - back-pack and bladder can protect the spine, and those silly looking helmets can save my life. I hope to make more memories on my bicycle, as I remind myself with memories of how awesome bicycle has been throughout my life!


Breathe!

and meditate!

Lessons of Life and Law Learned from Game of Thrones

Most of us woke up to the news this Sunday that Zimmerman was found not guilty. But we all know that he shot an boy... innocent or not, whatever. There's is a problem with the system here, no doubt. No system is perfect, otherwise we would all be happy gold fish living in a bowl.
People turn to the bible, to family, at this time... I'm turning to A Song of Ice and Fire, or even the Mahabharata, however the Game of Thrones is fresh in my mind.

Remember when Lord Eddard Stark was tried, though innocent, the hand of the king, with solid proof... he was still found guilty by the "King" and beheaded. Sure the system then was different, and the justice a bit barbaric. However those were the ways of men back then. Our children's children's children will look back a 100 years from now and find our system of law and justice barbaric, just as our seniors today see us killing our bodies with food packed with GMOs etc, killing our world by various other means, and our minds with endless use of technology... So on and so forth. Patterns keep repeating, and we never learn from our past.

Eddard Stark had proof of the late King's wishes, but the proof was conveniently dismissed, torn up by the Queen. Although he was loyal to the previous King, who he served as Hand to the King, he was found a traitor, although he had only been traitor to the king previous to who he had served. HE was not a traitor, but the Queen and the Kings own son were the actual traitors. Instead of serving a life sentence of taking the black, and working at the wall, he was beheaded by the "merciful" king (note the sarcasm). Is this justice? No, but it depends on who's perspective. Is this life? Yeah it is sadly.

In our eyes, this new king is absolutely horrid. But in his mother's eyes, in his own eyes, he is correct. It's his pride, arrogance, power, hate, sense of entitlement being a High Born Lord that blinds him, his mother. Maybe there is the notion of survival, flight or fight, fear... its all human, and its one we at our point of evolution should overcome. I sometimes wonder how many people fear me for I live in suburban/ to rural Ohio, the "Midwest". I wonder do they fear me for I look different from them? Although I may believe the same things they do, talk the way they do... they won't see it for 1- We don't don our similarities as well as we wear our skin color 2- they will be blinded by fear/preconceptions/stereotypes OR 3- they may realize - "oh she's an Indian, my doctor is an Indian too she's safe". Ever since I was in Kindergarten I've dealt with some sort of racism, not terrifying, but still it's made an impact. In the eyes of a Caucasian/Anglo Saxon, what they think and see is right, they don't see it from the other POV. So in Zimmerman's eyes he was right in what he did... Trayvon is dead so we will never see things from his perspective; too often though we are stereotyped by the color of our skin, we may just look at pop culture, media, our OWN selves to know this. This is the world we live in: black shooting black is normal. Black shooting white is murder. White shooting black is self defense. White shooting white... they're on crack cocaine. Do we need to go into more colors? Yellow shooting Brown, Brown shooting Hispanic?

Funny - I'm brown on the outside, white on the inside (actually pink), spiritual in my heart, and sometimes I do stand up comedy as an Indian- American Teapublican! It is funny, but this entire post is not at all really. After living in rural America, one learns how life can be hilarious and scary when juxtaposing people of different cities, cultures, races, religions, ideologies, education, accents etc. What where the eff did the Game of Thrones connection go?

Back to "the law", or system, because it's not racism, its not the fact a young underage boy was shot, and killed, a lot of people are pointing out that "the prosecution could not prove beyond reasonable doubt (or whatever the eff) that this fool of a took was a guilty mo fo" (ok so it wasn't said like that but I digress and get carried away). Basically there was not enough proof only the words of the defendant, the killer, the hero...

What about the victims right to stand his ground? Did he not have the right after being stalked like a deer, followed by a tiger? The laws of this land / Florida can be so strange at times. Does a black boy not have right to stand his ground? Following this case only made me angry, because it was their words against a dead boys life. How many of us as kids have wanted to be tough, and bad ass? How many of us have slept through classes and said "we don't need no education!" How many of us have indulged in a little bit of pot smoking until we had better sense? How many of us have worn a hoody cause that was the only clothing around (also as a girl its nice cause then you don't really have to wear a bra :-P ). Proof or no proof, we can only dig up so much based on what HE said. Just like any part of ancient history - unless we were really there, during the Mahabharata, we don't know "beyond reasonable doubt" if Duryodhana was really that much of a jerk. So we have a system in place which work SOME of the time but not ALL of the time. A system that has immense, gaping loop holes. You shot a kid cause you thought he was a what? He took a swipe at you cause why? Maybe he thought you wanted to butt rape him or steel his skittles?

Law as we have studied is the law of the land, the people, and most of all belongs to those who have power. Call me jaded, but after watching Indian politics, American politics, how do we fool our selves with a democracy? What does it even mean? There are no more literal crowns, but it is a fact "crowns" metaphoric, or literal do queer things to the heads of men below it. We have put in place a law: a queer law that serves few, and suppresses many, however we believe that law gives everyone the freedom to become a king with a little bit of competition...

All in all, life isn't fair, it's just not fair: so teach your children that from the start. There are so many people on the planet that you probably will end up dead, hungry or obese. Eddard Stark DIED, and Joffrey the ruthless rules, so does his mother, and his father. They are liars, murderers, and thieves, but Arya, Sansa, Robb, Bran and little Rickon just have to deal with it. This isn't the only example of injustice, but although one tries to be a good person, sometimes evil wins over (Sansa's Lady was killed cause Joffrey needed to see a wolf dead). Does that mean we quit being good? Nope... Do we give up? No. Although life isn't fair, sometimes we get what IS fair, and that's when we count our blessings. Is this the ultimate verdict on the Trayvon Martin murder case? NO! If the law didn't get him, something else will get Zimmerman for sure... I hope it's the Gators or those Pythons. That would be a natural form of justice. But right now I will let it go, for the universe has a way of evening out these things.


Breathe...


PS: actually I realized Sansa being stripped and humiliated at Joffrey's command was kind of like a guy who is just angry attacking something that seemed like a threat. To Joff Robb was a threat so he took his anger out on Sansa: sweet and innocent Sansa. Because he could.

Eddard serving out justice at the Queens order by putting down Lady... all because of Joffrey

Justice for Eddard

Happier days for Sansa and Lady

Patterns

"We hurt the ones we love the most"
Its a saying we always hear,
When we are sad, angry or in some difficulty
We lash out at the ones nearest
They are also the dearest.
By doing so we drive them away
In turn, they hurt someone else nearest
and dearest.


The pain continues
The hate increases
The egos engorge
The tears break.

They will cry alone
You will die alone
Cold and miserable
All because you wanted to be right.

They will appologize
You will stand up with pride
Assert your ego
You were always right!

They shake their head in sorrow
For you will never know tomorrow
You were blinded by ego
To see the simple beauty of a sparrow.

Don't be that person
Don't be the jerk
Tell your ego you're done with hurt
Let it go! Let it go! Let it go!

It's ok to love selflessly
It's ok to love unconditionally
Everyone loves a team player
No one likes the prideful selfish achiever.

When you are hurt or angry
When you are sad and lonely
Remember love
To love yourself first and everyone else.


So Fight back with love
Heal with time and patience
Confront with understanding
Calm the ego altogether.

Ruin the pattern
Break the cycle
Kill the ego
Meditate on being.

Breathe!

CATHARSIS

The purging of emotion.

Bottled up deep inside

though you have a smile

there is so much to hide

much to beguile.

Passion, Anger, Sorrow and Suffering

Frustrations, Anguish, Confusion, and Repression

Hurt, Pain, Rage a feeling of Chocking

Oppression, Conceal, Suppression....

A moment comes when we decide to let

the emotions that we've buried inside

to burst out, to jet

to flow and exit with the receding tide.

If the emotions make us a bubble,

or a balloon - a small nudge or snip

in the form of an external thrust to hell

can make us snap and pop.

The emotional purge can be beautiful

Sometimes it can be ugly

It can be dangerous to some and harmful

Yet it needs to be done, most definitely.

 Ophelia - Hamlet

I am the 99%... We are the generation!

I look back and I see I have a lot of unpublished blogs from 2009-2010... most of them reflecting my angst about my applying for jobs... occupy movement would appreciate those blogs. it took them three years to organize, when I was so raw with emotion then. However I realize I made it happen for me (with a little support from my friends, and family). I fear its not only the government, Wall-street, the 1%, but also institutions, a generation of people - who sell the idea that "once you go through college you will have an awesome career". of course you have to get the formula right - grades, participation, leadership in college, internships, assistant-ships...

Today, things have changed. They do not follow this "formula" anymore, unless you are a doctor or engineer (these too, might change) but it seems to be back to those days where you have to fend for yourself, intelligence, commonsense, sharpness and HARD WORK are what counts. You have to be willing to do whatever it takes.

After graduating with my masters - i expected a GIS analyst job. That's what they told us - with a masters you should be able to get a GIS analyst job. Bachelor degree holders usually get a GIS tech job. This idea is fed to us, also this IS why we are going to school, to get the BETTER job. World changes, history catches up... we can blame whoever we want, the presidents in the past, Bush, Obama, 1%... In the end, life comes at you, and you make of it what you want.

What are you waiting for another day, another storm, another talk? Take action...(peaceful action please).
I went on my own path. The whole "path" for Pree has been very interesting so far. Who knows where it will lead next.
The occupy people, I don't disagree with them, because they sought action which they seemed will/might help them.

"Change does come from within, but the winds of change can be blown from many different directions"

"Be strong, Be precise, Be the Tiger"

"You are the Generation" - Mr. L. Hartnett

I became the tiger, I am strong, I am working on being a better me! If I can do it, you can too! We all fall, get hurt, but we get back up and kick @$$ harder, stronger and better!

image credits: http://img.ibtimes.com/www/data/images/full/2011/10/14/174091-occupy-wall-street-march.jpg


Breathe!