Thursday, September 29, 2011

Aliens and Hexes

As a child, I always loved climbing stuff. Maybe humans have a natural inclination to climb. I climbed buildings, football goal posts, trees, walls, rocks/boulders etc.
Then somewhere the climbing stopped as it was inappropriate all of a sudden.
I wanted to start climbing again when I saw the rock wall at the University of Akron and wanted to get in shape to climb. I thought it was all arm strength. Little did I know it involved so so so much more.

So I wanted to have a strong upper body, but it was actually the whole body, mind and spirit. It all had to be in tune in sync with each other - this is what I learned much later.

I finally began climbing in 2009. I would do easy routes at the rock gym. I bought my own shoes and harness, but didn't learn to belay until 2011 summer. Therefore I really got into it in 2011. In 2009 I didn't push myself, mental conditioning was lacking a lot, technique lacked, and didn't handle the challenges enough.

As of 2011: I climbed outdoors, indoors and have see and experienced great heights. Mental conditioning - there is no end to that. Our minds are brilliant yet we have a lot of barriers to overcome. It is much like the matrix - you HAVE to "free you mind" so you have to get over the fact that "I can not" and just do it, because you can! (there are many proofs that one CAN do it, no matter what).

Seneca rocks - The beauty and intensity was mind numbing. I'm still reeling from the experience which I loved, but filled me with a 1000 different emotions, all as intense as the other... love, hate, anger, frustration, fear, self loathing, determination, exhaustion, warmth, cold, dread, fear, dread, love...

I was nervous the whole trip... irrational fears filled me: KKK, aliens, satanic worshipers... yes... I was "fear vomiting", cause I knew I would be stressed by the exposure of the cliff face we would be climbing. We were studying the book of the routes, self saving techniques, etc... funny thing was both aliens and hexes were mentioned on the same page (Seneca Rocks Climbing Guide). So the book makes it sound easy, but you know reality is different. Reality! Its just not a climb, its you, your mind, your body with the earth - doing together, getting to a higher place of consciousness and overcoming obstacles which include the above (your mind, body, spirit and the earth).

I also had a deep drunken conversation with Keith about eating animals, vegetarianism... which gave me a lot to think about and question, about respect, love, friendship, life and death. YES this is LIFE! We think about what nourishes us, where it comes from, it makes us do what we do, and we need to respect it (the food), ourselves, and our bodies.

So in tune with nature, body, mind and deep deep feelings, thoughts, beliefs... = Intense and beautiful.

The beauty and the intensity made me shed a tear or two, but I know its a catharsis I still need to face and let flow.





Breathe.




Thursday, September 15, 2011

Changes Occur... Like Seasons

So I feel like it has been ages since I wrote a blog.
It is almost fall.
Things have changed in my life.
I have changed my life.
I decided to change.
Then everything changed.
However I realized it is a lot of hard work.
Exhausting.

It takes persistence. Determination. Perseverance.
Now i realize it takes will. courage and that desire to follow through.

I am tired. However, I will not quit.

I will be like "the little train that could".
"I-think-I-can. I-think-I-can. I-think-I-can"
and if i pursue and keep at it and chug chug chug all the way up the mountain, one day I will be saying "I-thought-I-could. I-thought-I-could"
and "I-knew-I-could" and I will use that power to keep climbing higher hills.

If we give up at hill one, then we are stuck in the valley and never see the view from the summit. The lovely panorama. The mind blowing, eye opening vista that keeps us climbing up more mountains.

So keep climbing, and don't stop. Don't settle for the valley, but enjoy the journeys,experience the seasons and views. It's all one. Don't stop at one place. Accept the change and seek for new.


Find time to relax - breathe - smile!




<3 <3 <3