Today is a Gift, That's Why it is Called Present

Sometimes the now is very difficult. Especially when things bring you down, stressed, and eventually in the murky, grimy, dark depths of depression. It is difficult to free oneself from the oily greasy gook that bind our feathers of self worth together, joy and bravery, just like a bird caught in an oil spill. We are scared to emerge from that hole when finally free, because we are scared of being judged, or pushed back down there. Often it happens, over and over again, until one stops even trying to come out, and lives with the pessimism that there will be no way out.

People have told me about the book called "The Secret". I read it, I tried it, it works! However its very tricky, and hard to have that type of faith. Often people have faith through religion. The idea of God, helps many people in a lot of situations, and many out of these dark depressions. But how do you help someone, who is a good person, who has lost faith, who knows God can't love them because they can't even find a single reason to love themselves? The community aspect behind various religions helps people by bringing them together on the basis of faith, unity and helping each other. Humans have an inherent need to "belong", and it's ok, it's very hard to build the logic to fight it and to solo through life. Religion/ faith gives one strength to solo through life in someways as well, in example Sanyasis, Hrishis, ascetics etc. All religions preach a positivity, preach of a forgiving loving parental type God, which can help many through times of darkness, and crisis. Sometimes it helps for a while, but reality sets in again. Its almost like a different type of AA program.

AA I find is very effective when a person entrusts themselves into it. I have seen AA save lives, and change people for the better, more than any therapy, and medication could do. How? Same principle - community, faith, faith in self, sharing, accountability, caring. It has helped people out from the darkest, deathly of places, and kept them out, and in turn helped other people out too.

Right now I stand at cross roads in life. The traffic is fast paced, and I am standing in the center median of a 6 way intersection. Which way do I go? Each road vanishes into the darkness, the horns are blaring, the lights are changing, the vehicles flashing by me, almost tipping me over. I have nothing to hold onto, there is no map to help me, all I have is my breath, my being and my mind.

There's a lot going on without the world having to be in  the constant state of change, turmoil and trepidation. There is beauty that helps us day to day, like the beautiful bird in the tree, but when things spiral out of control, one only notices the bird poop, the annoying noisy neighbors, the decrepit nature of the world and the nastiness of human against human. Where did the love go? Where did "God" go?

Instead of worrying about them,  those people, her, and him, and the disgusting things people can do to one another, the mean things people do to me... I focus on NOW. My sis told me how a book called 'Be Here Now" by Ram Dass, has changed her life. She stops focusing on negatives, but on positives, especially other people. See once we even let out minds go to the dirty side, everything else gets polluted. So it's good to notice it, keep your side clean and carry on!

It's ok to cry and let the tears go, let them cleanse your being from the depression. Crying helps the body soul and mind let go of the depression you are sunken in. Let it out, and let it go. Then be in the now and breathe in and out. Notice how you feel.

Read: Ram Dass "Be Here Now"
Listen to: Huun-Huur-Tu (also on spotify)

 “It is important to expect nothing, to take every experience, including the negative ones, as merely steps on the path, and to proceed.”
― Ram Dass

“The heart surrenders everything to the moment. The mind judges and holds back.”
― Ram Dass




Breathe

Pic. Courtesy Conscious Culture

It's Time to Break the Chain

Have you noticed how this craze of violence, destruction, and terror, in the world,  occurs in waves, but in is also a constant?
What I mean is that although death, violence, destruction and devastation... what we call terror and war, is continuous globally,  there is something major that affects you, your country, something near you every 2-3 months, or makes it big in the news in terms of violence. In Nov, Dec, and Jan we were plagues with the headlines: girl is gang raped in Delhi, Colorado shooting, Connecticut School shooting... Now we have this focus on US drones killing many in Afghanistan and Pakistan; This week: 5 yr old raped in Delhi, Boston marathon bombing.
There is violence, death and destruction, everywhere that always doesn't make it to my attention, or big in the news that is shown in the US, but exists. We must be aware of this fact.
“World peace must develop from inner peace. Peace is not just mere absence of violence. Peace is, I think, the manifestation of human compassion.”
― Dalai Lama

That quote leads me to the next one:
 “There is a saying in Tibetan, 'Tragedy should be utilized as a source of strength.'
No matter what sort of difficulties, how painful experience is, if we lose our hope, that's our real disaster.”
― Dalai Lama XIV

Knowing there is violence, death, destruction and terror in the world, we must not lose hope, love, passion and give into fear or anger. Those two emotions lead to more of the violence, and destruction. Also always keep the ego in check!

So this pattern of violence, that turns good people into scared, and angry people, which thus turns them violent, hateful and destructive (you have been through it, even in a small way), people. We are unable to get over our egos, and calm ourselves down and see the bigger picture (simple psychology, philosophy and Buddhism, please read up on it, and try to keep your heart and mind open). I dunno much, but I do know this guy, the Dalai Lama has some keen insights into life, living, the world and peace, and although so hard to follow at times, the simple messages he communicates speak such truth.

Is it time to break the pattern or what? There is a chain of violence that needs to be broken. It can not be broken by death, war, punishment, revenge, hate, anger, fear, destruction, devastation, or more killing. Although sometimes the ego says "oh yeah you think you can hurt me? I'm gonna stamp you out!" "I will kill you to protect myself my family" Instead of trying to approach a situation of threat in a different way.
I've been using different approaches to situations that hurt me, make me angry, frustrated and scare me.

Sometimes we feel that the world is a huge place and nothing we do can make a difference?
“If you think you are too small to make a difference, try sleeping with a mosquito.”
― Dalai Lama
We are all mosquitoes and we CAN make a difference. And the difference we will make is through love, kindness and compassion.
“Love and compassion are necessities, not luxuries. Without them, humanity cannot survive.” ― Dalai Lama, The Art of Happiness

“Our prime purpose in this life is to help others. And if you can't help them, at least don't hurt them.” ― Dalai Lama

“The whole purpose of religion is to facilitate love and compassion, patience, tolerance, humility, and forgiveness.” ― Dalai Lama

 “If you can cultivate the right attitude, your enemies are your best spiritual teachers because their presence provides you with the opportunity to enhance and develop tolerance, patience and understanding.” ― Dalai Lama


Instead of wondering how to end it, think of why they are doing this so we can prevent it in the future. Instead of thinking of punishing, or revenge, why not think about forgiveness, and killing them with kindness. When I say kill them with kindness, I don't mean death, but show them so much compassion that it melts away their evilness. I swear it works! It is so hard to do, because we are hurt, in pain, angry, and scared, and it takes so much to become a bigger better person. So much energy, love and mindfulness to forgive, and love in exchange for hate.

I'm not saying wrong doers must not be punished, they should be, but it is time to break the chains, to create real change. And warn evil doers, and help change them before they act. These depend on us though, our behavior, we are mosquitoes, we are the world, the people and we are all connected. As my friend Celeste said today on a facebook status, "Hate begets hate. Anger begets anger. How many horrendous things will have to happen before we choose love and connection? Clearly, hate and separation really isn't working." This is my message and question too!

In the end of your life though you choose what you want to be...

“Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions.”
― Dalai Lam

“If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion.”
― Dalai Lama

“Only the development of compassion and understanding for others can bring us the tranquility and happiness we all seek.”
― Dalai Lama

“All suffering is caused by ignorance. People inflict pain on others in the selfish pursuit of their own happiness or satisfaction”
― Dalai Lama

 Breathe!

False Emotion Appearing Real - FEAR

False Emotion Appearing Real - FEAR
Something my sister told me once, I don't know where she heard it, however it was her response to me expressing insecurities. She helped me through the process explaining that it's in my mind and not true, and once I realized that I was free. I was not captured by my own fear.

Truly what do we fear, it is an emotional reaction to help us preserve our selves, often unfounded. We make ourselves believe things, and we begin to protect ourselves. That could be good or bad, but realizing the process of this (metacognition) is utterly valuable, for it then opens doorways which we otherwise would not have been able to cross.

My fear: climbing. And yes I am a climber.
Every time I am up there, the fear that I will fall clutches at me. I can't make a difficult move, I over analyze it. I stop trying, because I am too busy thinking, and my hands begin to sweat, my mind thinks, ' now i will definitely slip and fall'... the circle of fear begins. The whole time I know that my belayer has me, and I truly have nothing to worry about. We check the gear, we double checked everything, so this fear is for the sake of fearing? Silly me.
I am working hard on mentally overcoming this. I can climb outdoors fine, I just can't deal with the exposure (example: a cliff, my bane Seneca Rocks, WV, and other such "structures").

So how do we work with our "FEARs"  and get over it?

1- stop thinking (distract yourself - read, draw, movie, friends, puppy... any number of things. use your imagination!)
2- when you are in that position of "FEAR" / scared/ anxiety/ stress - think about what it really is "False Emotion Appearing Real". Question it, logically, understand it, understand yourself.
3- Face it - if you are afraid of spiders - go to a petting zoo and pet one; dogs - go find a puppy and ask to play with it; being alone - go spend a day with your favorite person (yourself) and do it more often; the basement - put on the lights, take a knife with you and go downstairs and then realize how silly you are
4- there are things we are all afraid of, and there's nothing to be ashamed of. My silliest fears are clowns, balloons, thunder, and fireworks (they all go pop/boom which startles me, and makes me rather upset. the clown uses balloons to make pop sounds which are supposed to be funny? associated fear). So what I try to do is I expect it every second, and become less afraid. I Try. But once you accept your fear, face it, come to terms and understand it, it gets easier from there.

I'm still "afraid" of climbing up Seneca Rocks, but I will do it someday. I have to understand that although the exposure is pretty crazy, it is doable, and my belayer has got me (the thought still makes me sick). One key aspect of me overcoming this is me becoming a better climber and having more confidence. Once I can do "difficult" moves, I should think that the rock is no problem for me. Hearing 5.8 or 5.9 level climbing right now, does scare me a little. So I start small and dream big, and work hard to get there!

breathe

My sister spinning poi