False Emotion Appearing Real - FEAR
Something my sister told me once, I don't know where she heard it, however it was her response to me expressing insecurities. She helped me through the process explaining that it's in my mind and not true, and once I realized that I was free. I was not captured by my own fear.
Truly what do we fear, it is an emotional reaction to help us preserve our selves, often unfounded. We make ourselves believe things, and we begin to protect ourselves. That could be good or bad, but realizing the process of this (metacognition) is utterly valuable, for it then opens doorways which we otherwise would not have been able to cross.
My fear: climbing. And yes I am a climber.
Every time I am up there, the fear that I will fall clutches at me. I can't make a difficult move, I over analyze it. I stop trying, because I am too busy thinking, and my hands begin to sweat, my mind thinks, ' now i will definitely slip and fall'... the circle of fear begins. The whole time I know that my belayer has me, and I truly have nothing to worry about. We check the gear, we double checked everything, so this fear is for the sake of fearing? Silly me.
I am working hard on mentally overcoming this. I can climb outdoors fine, I just can't deal with the exposure (example: a cliff, my bane Seneca Rocks, WV, and other such "structures").
So how do we work with our "FEARs" and get over it?
1- stop thinking (distract yourself - read, draw, movie, friends, puppy... any number of things. use your imagination!)
2- when you are in that position of "FEAR" / scared/ anxiety/ stress - think about what it really is "False Emotion Appearing Real". Question it, logically, understand it, understand yourself.
3- Face it - if you are afraid of spiders - go to a petting zoo and pet one; dogs - go find a puppy and ask to play with it; being alone - go spend a day with your favorite person (yourself) and do it more often; the basement - put on the lights, take a knife with you and go downstairs and then realize how silly you are
4- there are things we are all afraid of, and there's nothing to be ashamed of. My silliest fears are clowns, balloons, thunder, and fireworks (they all go pop/boom which startles me, and makes me rather upset. the clown uses balloons to make pop sounds which are supposed to be funny? associated fear). So what I try to do is I expect it every second, and become less afraid. I Try. But once you accept your fear, face it, come to terms and understand it, it gets easier from there.
I'm still "afraid" of climbing up Seneca Rocks, but I will do it someday. I have to understand that although the exposure is pretty crazy, it is doable, and my belayer has got me (the thought still makes me sick). One key aspect of me overcoming this is me becoming a better climber and having more confidence. Once I can do "difficult" moves, I should think that the rock is no problem for me. Hearing 5.8 or 5.9 level climbing right now, does scare me a little. So I start small and dream big, and work hard to get there!
breathe
Something my sister told me once, I don't know where she heard it, however it was her response to me expressing insecurities. She helped me through the process explaining that it's in my mind and not true, and once I realized that I was free. I was not captured by my own fear.
Truly what do we fear, it is an emotional reaction to help us preserve our selves, often unfounded. We make ourselves believe things, and we begin to protect ourselves. That could be good or bad, but realizing the process of this (metacognition) is utterly valuable, for it then opens doorways which we otherwise would not have been able to cross.
My fear: climbing. And yes I am a climber.
Every time I am up there, the fear that I will fall clutches at me. I can't make a difficult move, I over analyze it. I stop trying, because I am too busy thinking, and my hands begin to sweat, my mind thinks, ' now i will definitely slip and fall'... the circle of fear begins. The whole time I know that my belayer has me, and I truly have nothing to worry about. We check the gear, we double checked everything, so this fear is for the sake of fearing? Silly me.
I am working hard on mentally overcoming this. I can climb outdoors fine, I just can't deal with the exposure (example: a cliff, my bane Seneca Rocks, WV, and other such "structures").
So how do we work with our "FEARs" and get over it?
1- stop thinking (distract yourself - read, draw, movie, friends, puppy... any number of things. use your imagination!)
2- when you are in that position of "FEAR" / scared/ anxiety/ stress - think about what it really is "False Emotion Appearing Real". Question it, logically, understand it, understand yourself.
3- Face it - if you are afraid of spiders - go to a petting zoo and pet one; dogs - go find a puppy and ask to play with it; being alone - go spend a day with your favorite person (yourself) and do it more often; the basement - put on the lights, take a knife with you and go downstairs and then realize how silly you are
4- there are things we are all afraid of, and there's nothing to be ashamed of. My silliest fears are clowns, balloons, thunder, and fireworks (they all go pop/boom which startles me, and makes me rather upset. the clown uses balloons to make pop sounds which are supposed to be funny? associated fear). So what I try to do is I expect it every second, and become less afraid. I Try. But once you accept your fear, face it, come to terms and understand it, it gets easier from there.
I'm still "afraid" of climbing up Seneca Rocks, but I will do it someday. I have to understand that although the exposure is pretty crazy, it is doable, and my belayer has got me (the thought still makes me sick). One key aspect of me overcoming this is me becoming a better climber and having more confidence. Once I can do "difficult" moves, I should think that the rock is no problem for me. Hearing 5.8 or 5.9 level climbing right now, does scare me a little. So I start small and dream big, and work hard to get there!
breathe
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| My sister spinning poi |
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