Gozaimasu!

Japan:

the place I have searched for all my life...

love...

peace...



...breathe!



Home is where the heart is... I feel at home! Yet I know my home is the world, for there, truthfully, is my heart.

The world is beautiful... when you give up... the game ends! so don't give up, there is beauty yet to be seen, if you know where to search. search well. search hard!

To Write or Not to Write...

I have been meaning to write a new blog for a long time, however my mind has been occupied with all the other silly worries we choose to stress ourselves out with.
The power of the mind is limitless (further blogs may explain this), and my sister and I always try to use "the secret" and other thought processes to manifest what we want.
I usually make lists of what I want to write about, and never get to it. Friday, I wanted to blog about health, yoga, meditation and manifesting our lives. However it's Sunday and I never got down to it (now it's Monday). I told myself - I have to write about something. Anything!
I thought back to a feeling in the past when I was so inspired, and I realized I had to write about that emotionally stirring moment. It was the while traveling on the plane... It was dark and I was blurry eyed with tears to even try to write then. That is my "muse moment", and Life in A Day awakens and awakened something in me.
I have thus realized, inspiration/motivation comes from within. It is our own minds. Yes once we master our minds, we are more powerful than some bloke who goes and masters countries.
I now know what I can do. I suggest you start mastering your mind and start motivating and inspiring yourself. There is no need for an outside anything. You have it inside!

There is no such thing as writers block... it is a decision we make subconsciously or consciously! Know thyself.

Breathe!

Manifesting: Beauty Love Peace and Success ... and Duh Winning! :-)

Life: In a second... in a day... in a year... a lifetime of moments!

On the plane ride from Newark to Delhi, I watched a few very very dull films: The zookeeper (oh why did i pick this one?) and Bad Teacher (They should show this movie to torture people. Honestly how immature and shallow does one get!). There were a few good movies I picked: The Help. It brought tears to my eyes. It reminded me of Gopa Didi, the lady that helped bring me up. She was with our family since I was 7 in Chennai. She took care of me (my sister and I), bathed me, washed my clothes, cooked for me and sometimes even tucked me into bed. She saw me grow up. Then she had a child and got married. She and her daughter lived with us for a while in Calcutta. I saw Gopa Didi's daughter till she was about 5. Now she is 15, and speaks English, Tamil, Hindi and Bengali! She writes lovely poetry and has memories from what her mother speaks of. She has a younger sister who is hyper and naughty, and a 2 year old brother who can't walk but is utterly cute. Her name was Trishna, but we called her Chintamani (chinta-thinking, mani - the one: the one that thinks too much). I took a video of the brother who walks with the help of a luggage dolly which my dad purchased in the 80's. It's amazing how something so mundane from over 20 years ago can create such a difference in this little boy's life. I was close to tears. I shall try to post the video sometime. In India people (such as Gopa Didi and her family) who come from a village, place more value in having a son than little girls. This is because the boy can work bring money home, and the girl needs a dowry later in life and is just another mouth to feed. This leads to female infanticide in Indian villages. So this family was humbled by being blessed by two bright lovely girls, and a son who has been slow in development. It took them heartbreak and hardship to realize the value in girls, and yes having a son is great, but now a days girls can accomplish as much as boys can. So what they thought was a curse, is now a blessing. However their families in the village do not understand and still think they are "cursed" and have cut them off. Having two girls and a slow boy is not a "blessing" to them. They don't see. I sometimes think it took my own grandparents many years, and loyalties to realize the value of Granddaughters, daughters and girls. The world is such a beautiful place thanks to girls, such as Trishna, and her sister. Their innocence, joy in simple things and enthusiasm in life, makes one see the world from such a different perspective. Children, will do that to you. Do you remember those days? I do!

This is a Picture of Chintamani (Trishna Ghosal) and I. She goes to school in Chennai, India and lives in a very humble but warm home, and could achieve awesomness if she had the opportunity. I shall try to help send some $ her and her siblings' way. If anyone wants to contribute, that would be lovely $1 can make a difference!

This is a video of the Little Boy: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WvemZl65I6k

Talking about joys in simple things... I watched another movie: Life in a day. It is an amalgamation of videos sent from all over the world, to youtube, and it was all shot on one day July 24th 2010 (which is also my sister's birthday!)... I don't remember exactly what I was doing that day, but it was a Saturday. I posted this on FB: The fragrance always stays in the hand that gives the rose. --Hada Bejar
And I probably called my sister and wished her, at this time she was going through a very rough patch. Do you remember what you did that day?

I would definitely recommend watching this movie because it is beautiful... its reminds us it is the little things that count. It is eye opening, and moving in the most unsuspecting ways. I liked it so much I watched it on the flight back to USA. I bought the movie and now am watching it with everyone. Every time I watch it, it is new! I see something I had not seen before! That is life!

This movie has strong affect... because it is real, raw, surprising, and it is LIFE! It made me realize that every moment, every little thing, is new and beautiful! Celebrate and love each moment we are alive. Everything is proof we are alive: living, heart beating, lungs breathing, eyes seeing... life experiencing. It is happening! Absorb, observe, be and enjoy. Learn, Love, and Laugh to it...

There are some dark moments in the movie. Yet these moments might be subjective to the viewers perspective. This reminds us that there are many people out there, everyone is different... it is up to us if we are haters, or lovers! If we see things "this way" or "that way"!

My dark moment was life and death: slaughtering animals... I made a friend on the streets of Delhi... it was a goat... Goat meat is delicious, but this goat (see below) came up to me and nuzzled against me and reminded me of all my doggies (doggie blog soon to be posted). That's one thing about India, that no matter where I go, there are doggies, goats, cows and other animals, and I don't need language to communicate with them, and they don't see me as foreigner or Indian. I just am a human to them who shows affection and they warm up to me. So my conclusion was, how can I eat my friend. So I decided to stop eating the mammals.

My goat friend and I (Nizamuddin, Delhi)

I definitely recommend watching it, and I would love to hear what you think about it!! Here's a picture of the DVD cover. Also the music/soundtrack is lovely!

Live Life! Breathe!
My New Year's Eve Idea was this... Instead of celebrating One night, celebrate each moment... as in live in it and BE PRESENT. For EVERYDAY is a NEW day! Every Moment is New and Happening! Live it! Love it!

(shrutipb@gmail.com)


 I found out - My friend Miles Reed has some footage in this film.
Also upon googling I found this article by NYT. It is the flip side, the point of view of those who won't enjoy the film... probably people who want the standard formula, and nothing exotic and different!

http://movies.nytimes.com/2011/07/29/movies/life-in-a-day-review.html

All I can say is this guy probably enjoyed Transformers.


It's a powerful movie! Watch it!

Her Suffering... Hurts Like Heaven

They say, "if you give a lot of love, you receive twice as much in return." Or something of the sort. So do love effortlessly and selfless-ly.

She lies there on a cot (wooden bed frame), looking at me through such sad eyes. She lets out a wail of distress, and I feel my face go from a smile to utter horror, and sorrow. There is so much pain in the wail. She writhes about on the wooden surface which is covered in plastic, in distress. Her face contorts, she opens her mouth to attempt to talk, but nothing comes out. Then she cries out; The loud moan is unbearable, and makes me want to cry. Only her eyes are steadfast, and grave with unrest and discomfort. So much pain.
Physical, and that of the heart.
Her eyes speak to me, over all the chatter. I try to smile, but my heart is bleeding.

It is like she is trapped inside her own mind and body. Her body wont work, wont talk, but she speaks with her eyes, and exudes love.

Memories of when she was totally contrary to what she is now: bubbly, active, loving, mobile, chattering with the birds!
I remember how she would take such good care of me, always be utterly positive, and never say a mean word about anyone...
Why?
How?
When?
These things we will never know... but I know who she is deep down inside, and love her to death. I can't be happy for how she is right now. I can't stand to see her in this state of anguish, I hope she is freed from it soon.
This has wieghed so heavily on my heart and mind since I visited her. They take good care of her, but the thing is they don't know why she is in this condition... a stroke perhaps? parkinsons? That is what they are treating her for, but it isnt helping. There is only so much one can do for her at this point. I feel helpless and wish she was well again. I wish she was her same bubbly, active self.
Made me realize we have to be grateful, take care and maintain our good health. We can make the change by taking care of ourselves, not being paranoid about silly stuff, but feeding ourselves good foods, hydrating, exercising... I am also glad for this catharsis, I held it in thus long. I wish I could talk to her, but it is so hard to do... I would sing her the song true colors... cause I know she is still in there.

So true colors goes out to my Mejho Dida (my great middle aunt)

You with the sad eyes,
don't be discouraged,
though I realize
its hard to take courage,
in a world full of people,
you can lose sight of it all,
and the darkness, inside you
makes you feel so small.

But I see your true colors
shining through,
I see your true colors, that's why I love you,
and don't be afraid to let them show... your true colors... are beautiful like a rainbow.

Show me a smile then,
don't be unhappy, don't remember when
I last saw you laughing.
If this world makes you crazy
and you've taken all you can bear,
just call me up cause you know I'll be there.

I see your true colors
shining through,
I see your true colors, that's why I love you,
and don't be afraid to let them show... your true colors... are beautiful like a rainbow.

I will always remember you the way you were at heart.
I will always remember your loveliness.



Breathe.

Glimpses From A Rickshaw

I walked to the main road and caught a rickshaw... the bicyclist said he would take me through the inner roads however, instead of the main roads. I took this alternative mode of transportation cause the three taxis had all the excuses in the world not to drive at 9:00 am 1- car is broken, 2- jaboo na (wont go) 3- washing car.

The inner roads the rickshaw walla took were really gully-gully windy roads... suddenly there was a intersection and clearing, where there was a little vegetable market... right there in the middle of the road, in the middle of the little golf green area behind south city mall. There were people waking up, and showering, drinking their morning chai, and spitting. Honestly it was 9:30 by now and these people were still waking up! What a life!

Doggie was sleeping right at the edge of the road and the rickshaw wallah irritably said "aiy!" yet in a very laid back manner, so typical to Bengalis. Suddenly the a load but squeaky horn sounds behind us, and we give way to a little lorry that passes us, and kicks up immense amount of dhullo (dust). I cough. The rickshaw wallah pedals on.

We pass a man slowly opening his store, the sound of shaankh baajna (conch shell or "shankar dhoni") shokal balai (morning time); there are men sitting and staring into space, minds still foggy, sipping on hot chai in little clay cups... a man at a corner enjoys a biddi while sipping on chai. This was the morning scene.

Once at south city there was a lot of rush, and people trying to catch any mode of transportation (this was near lord's er moor - lord's junction). A crow shat on my head, while I was trying to hail down a cab. My friend texted saying I was now blessed with good luck. Stinky good luck and still no cab.Finally I got a cab, who reluctantly took me where I wanted to go.

On the way back, my friend accompanied me till Golpark (round park, a circle and major junction). Then I got off at South city mall so I could get a book at a store there, since the book I had bought previously off the street vendor, was OK for the most part, but a few important pages were blank! Acquired the book and a few more hindi movies, and I was able to get a rickshaw guy right at the mouth of South City Mall. I told him "please take me to golf green", but he had no idea of where golf green was (how strange). So I said, "behind the TV towers", then he understood. So of we went down Uday Shankar Sarani (which is adjacent to Prince Anwar Shah Road). So this Doordarshan ("seen from afar" tv station) Bangla main station is there. On that road, a guy was washing the car, a two men working on a car, wearing lungi (cloth tied around the bottom areas) and ghamcha (cloth towel) on shoulder, another man was painting his shop, a dog was sitting and patiently awaiting scraps from a street side food stall, a couple was being annoyed by a person trying to sell stuff, another man was lecturing two other guys, probably giving them "gyan" (knowledge/edumacation)... So went the afternoon, so went the little snippets of south cal life from a rickshaw...